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Poly Bitchings

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Perfect! [Aug. 31st, 2005|04:14 pm]
Poly Bitchings
poly_bitch
[bitchin_moanin]
I have never seen something so perfect. Here I am bitchin & moanin about my Poly life, and lo and behold what do I find???

Here is a little intro and then on to my bitch of the day

Poly for 7 years in a FFM triad. Although we have been more of a V for a couple of years now. I am the "other" woman attached to an already married couple.

Our relationship has been extremely rocky as of late. I am not getting along with my g/f AT ALL. I can't even call her my friend right now. Even though my relationship with the husband is strong, even that has been suffering from it too.

We always argue about money & general housekeeping rules. I am at my wits end. Any suggestions on how to set up some our finances 3 ways besides by thirds? I work 2 jobs, go to school and make the least amount of money in the house but pay almost 70% of the mortgage along with my own expenses related to personal debt (car, credit cards, gym etc.). Literally every penny is accounted for in my budget but yet I am always being chastised for not contributing to extracirricular activites.

I have a low tolerance for messes, however I am the first person to leave for work and the last person to arrive home for the day. Am I being unreasonable for assuming that someone else is going to cook & clean by the time I roll in at 7pm? On the weekends I am always cooking & cleaning up, seems fair to me.

Someone please either validate my feelings or tell me to shut the hell up. I am just frustrated. Help!
LinkReply

Comments:
From: graciegrrl
2005-09-01 06:11 pm (UTC)

Re: They are being very unfair.

i agree with the conclusion, but the way suggested is going to backfire.

i'm working with the assumption you want a amicable resolution that involves equitable distrubution of money, a clean home and a lack of snarky comments on everyone's part.

you're going to need a lot of patience for yourself and both of them to get this on track, but don't start out with the idea of punishing... rather, when you break things down say listen, this is what i can afford, this is what we can afford. if i'm home cleaning all weekend, i'm not going to want to go out and i'm not going to feel very romantic when i'm up to my elbows in borax and windex.

Gracie

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: bitchin_moanin
2005-09-01 06:48 pm (UTC)

Re: They are being very unfair.

Thanks for that. I will have to try to exercise restraint a little better next time.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)